warm.

one of my all time favorites.

merry christmas from the garvins!

...today

i made this for adam. one of our favorite, take us back to years a go, always makes us smile, songs. <3

i don't have much to say today or pictures to post.

buuuttt,

you should buy some avon from me :)

www.youravon.com/ashleygarvin

ummm ettt (drum set in jonah talk)

this is one of jonah's christmas presents that we let him have early. gramps gave us money to get out own presents this year and we picked out a drum set! are we the craziest parents ever or just the coolest!?

everything rests on you.

sweetness.

i just had the best 15 minutes of my life.
pure happiness.


me doing dishes and hearing jonah and adam playing in the other room. then adam tells jonah to run up and hug me, he does and then hits me in the butt and runs away. i chase jonah and “get” him and then suddenly the game turns into get mommy. they both tickle me and we all start chasing and tickling eachother. then jimmy eats world’s “sweetness” comes on and we dance and sing.

this is the life.

smile like you mean it.

....

go ahead and judge me for embracing that i'm creative. it's just showing me that you aren't.

you Won't know

achievement unlocked! 2 years! 50 G

Today is the hubby and i's 2nd anniversary.
First of all I'm not gonna lie, we forgot until just the other day. Who has time or money this time of year?
Secondly, it hasn't been easy. We have issues like the rest of couples do. Pre-marriage counseling told us it would be rough but we never thought much about it. We thought we were different....
Not to say we haven't had our good times! Making this little family was the best desicion I've ever made and i believe he feels the same way too.
I would like to say there are many things that i appreciate and love about our marriage. Too many things to type and not enough time in the day to do so. Here are a few of the things that I love about us.
-we play video games together. like dudes. like best friends. we bond and kick butt.
-we can communicate so well. i hear of other couples having issues with being able to talk about how they feel but we usually don't. we are not perfect with it by any means. but we try really hard ever since we had the training from the pre-marriage counseling.
-we have a huge history together. we dated almost 2 years starting out when i was only 14 and he was 15. we had a break and got back together senior year. we were good friends from the moment we started talking in 8th grade. when i went to start school there they have a little orientation for new students and i met his mom before him as she was part of the staff. i remember him telling me later she talked to him about me, how i was pretty and he might like me. :)
-we have very similar senses of humor. we feed off each others jokes so much and have eachother cracking up. i love that about us because it always seemed like i would never find someone who really understood my humor.
-we have similar taste in music. we have the music that we both like. then like adam likes christian metal, i don't really but i don't mind most of it. then i'm into a lot of stuff he doesn't really like but will tolerate. just another thing that i'm glad we don't have to worry about it.

and most of all, we both just love eachother. so much.

for instance. that two years that we were apart we would see eachother from time to time. sometimes having some periods of time in there where we were hanging out. but mostly we both just felt like we were waiting. i didn't admit this until not too long a go when he said the same thing to me. he was always that guy. i would always get that feeling when i saw him. and when we got back together, we both just kinda knew it was right.
it's kinda hard to talk about that time because of circumstances with my ex. but i'm okay with it now. i loved him too. just not like adam. just as a friend. i was foolish for leading him on for 2 years. for talking about marriage and kids. i was a kid. and i know it was sudden and seemed cold hearted but i couldn't lead him on anymore. adam and i both wanted to be together so badly. i know it doesn't seem possible to just know when your 18...but we did. i'm glad that i've made the life choices i have, as adam, jonah and i wouldn't be here or who we are today.

adam-
i appreciate you so much. i'm glad i get to wake up everyday as mrs. garvin. i'm happy i chose you. you are a beautiful person. i'm lucky to have you babe.

Life even in Death.

Last night I had this very, very vivid dream I wanted to share.


It was Thanksgiving day and the whole family was at grandma and grandpa's house as usual. All but granny, she had passed away in the dream just like reality.

I was holding Jonah when I looked up and saw this picture of Christ on the cross on her wall. I started looking around the room at each and every person there. I saw my grandma around all of them. Each person, for a spilt second, she was next to, hugging, reaching out to them.

I then looked down at my son, Jonah whom I was holding and I felt this presence of granny behind me. Holding me. Looking down at Jonah and I. I looked up and saw her face for just a second before it disappeared. I had an overwhelming feeling of grief. sadness.

I handed Jonah to my mother and walked back into grandma's bedroom. This had been where I grieved alone while spending the hours after her death at their house in reality. I walked to her bed and her rosary bead were placed on her side of the bed. The same beads that I carried with me when I was growing up. That she and I loved so much. And that I had personally placed in her coffin before they put her in the ground. I picked them up and sat down.

While staring at the beads and sobbing, missing her so much I felt a warm brush on my shoulder. It startled me and I looked up into my grandmother's eyes. Except it looked like she did in the black and white pictures I loved so much. The ones where she was 20 years old and beautiful as can be.

She looked at me with her head slightly tilted and said, "dear. Why are you crying? I'm so happy."
"granny. we miss you so much. i cant-", she stopped me.
"Ashley, I'm in heaven. I have life again in Christ. I have my friends with me. I play bingo and run. I'm free, I worship God, and it's beautiful there. Don't cry for me. We will be together again."

She was gone.

Find this silly. I know it was a message from her. From God. I never believed in any of this stuff until this day.

I love you granny.
Thank you.

...Love...

Don't take life for granted.

To live is Christ. To die is gain.

This has by far been the hardest year of my life and the worst thing happened Thursday morning.

My grandmother, Shirley, passed away from a very sudden, unexpected heartattack.

Let me start by telling you just how hard this is on my family and I.

Most grandparents you see at holidays. My grandparents are much, much more than that.

My grandmother (we called her granny), was the sweetest soul I've ever known. She reached out and tried to help whoever she knew, didn't know, it didn't matter to her. She loved people. She gave everything she had to make anyone happy and didn't expect anything in return.

She would call and talk about your life. Never a complaint about hers. She would just listen when you needed to talk and give you the best, moral advice she had. I've never met a person on this earth with such high moral standards.

She made friends with people at the grocery store. Complete strangers. She had love just pouring out of her. You could see in it her. You could see the love of Christ in her and flowing out of her to touch others.

She would always make sure everyone had their food before she would even sit down to eat.

I told her I wanted a crock pot so I could make pot roast. Two days later there was a crock pot and everything to make a roast at my house ready for me when I got home from work.

She never left my sister's side when she was in the hospital with cancer. never.

I told her I loved purple when I was seven. once. Up until the day she died, she remembered that and everything she bought me was purple if she could help it.

She stayed up all night before holidays wrapping, cooking and making sure everything was perfect so that we could have a beautiful, wonderful time. and we always did.

She was such a dancer. She sang karoke at our family reunion last year to baby got back while actually dancing some pretty hip moves.

She took in all the in laws as her own children, grandchildren, and even her friends were family to her.

If there is any indication of how powerful her love was and what a deep impact she had in people's life, this is it.Adam lived with both sets of his grandparents for some time. One of them even babysat him most of his childhood. And in the 6 years he's known my granny he says she was more of a grandmother to him than his own.


This is what my grandma was.
love.
loyalty.
beauty.
selfless.
genuine.
caring.
woman of God.

I could go on forever. She wouldn't want me to. She would want me to remember her but try, try hard to move on. And this is what I'm going to try and do for you granny.

Jonah won't go a day in his life without hearing about you or feeling your love in my heart.



I will never forget you granny. 11/13/1935-11/12/2009
You lived a beautiful life.

my first senior pictures!