raisins, futons, and poopy fingers

my son's gone crazy! the past several weeks he has been buttering me up and now it's all crashing down in my face. i've always been the mom who doesn't spoil her son and doesn't let him eat a cookie right after time out, but for 3 weeks before yesterday, that was me. before then jonah wasn't doing the worst things i had ever seen kids do, just a little rebellious and cute. (he liked to give us kisses when we were mad! how can you stay mad?) well this week, especially the last 2 days, he's driving me nuts. i almost cried because i had to change 2 poopy diapers at the exact same time yesterday, one of those had poo on their fingers and another that wasn't poopy had it on him...i teach them to share mmk. while i was cleaning up one's hands jonah was dumping my purse everywhere and made a huge mess. when i was cleaning that up, two of them helped each other dump my basket with my important papers and notebooks that i recently had so perfectly organized. so i sit my purse down and hurry to get the post it notes out of their mouths and jonah dumps my purse again. jonah got time out upstairs while the other two fought over who got to stand in front of the door. i break that up still not done with the mess, jonah's screaming upstairs, (only for about 2 mins, after that he started playing with the mat in the pack and play. awesome time out.) kitty is hyper and runs across our mantle thing, knocks down a tea light candle i had to sit there after prying it from jonah's chubby little hands earlier that day, and another 2 year old picks it up and takes a bite out of it. after this it's a blur. adam got home and he's always a help. i felt like i wasn't cut out for sitting or being a mom. jonah is 1 and a half now and i know that's close to the terrible twos but i got too laid back with him. i should have never fed him that raisin while he was in time out. i shouldn't have let him eat his lunch on the kitchen table that day or stand on the printer and get crumbs down in it. well i guess i didn't let him do that one. i got depressed today because we moved our recliner to the basement due to the fact that he cannot get jonah to stop eating the fuzz out of the hole in it. so we brought up this very nice futon that a family member gave us which is good because i have been wanting to use it but it doesn't match my room at all and that's one thing i can say i do ok, decorate or at least make it look decent with very little money. but who can do that when my candle holder turned into a raisin holder and my lamp just something fun to shake around? now my room looks awkward but at least its more convenient with kids and i guess that's ok. : ) i really do like kids. i'm just now realizing why my mom always said you can have all that once your kids are grown and moved out. i'm ranting when i really need to do some dishes. kbye.

adam ant

I love my husband!!!!!&()^%$!

love you miss hannah

R.I.P Hannah Young


such a tragedy. and since this is the second tragedythat hit our small community in 6 weeks i started really questioning a lot. i read 90 minutes in heaven last night and it helped me a lot. i was having a really hard time coping with the death of another young person not for me but i was deeply mourning for her parents loss. 90 mins in heaven gave me so much hope in this dark time about what hannah is enjoying and what is to come for me. at the end of the book, don talks about this little old women who asks him if her deceased husband is happy and if he misses her. he tells her he surely is happy and he does not miss her. as bad as that may sound, our loved ones who are now with their creator do not miss us left on the earth. that would mean there is hurt and pain. in heaven God wipes all that away. Hannah is not grieving leaving us behind, she's rejoicing in the Lord. and as hard as this tragic loss of a beautiful life is, remember that before Hannah knows it she will be meeting each of you believers and close friends at the gates of heaven, no "time" would have passed by for her since there is no time in heaven. all she is doing is worshipping and praising the Lord and she feels more joy than we can ever even express on earth.

your plan is flawless Lord no matter how flawed it seems on earth.

squeezies, new phones and horrible old drivers

Abby's addiction posts made me think of my new found addiction...squeezies. those little kool aid filled plastic containers are so delicious and wonderful and just a dollar for six! they have so many colors and now they have "water" ones! amazing!
(this is serious people, they have a lot of sugar and are way too convenient to just grab and drink. help!)

i had road rage today. i wasn't even driving. this makes my husband pretty angry at me as well. i can't help it, people that live in beavercreek just drive too dang crazy!

at&t sucked me and the hubby into buying new phones. both our erricsons broke (his after about 2 months and mine after about 7 but still) and we only had one tiny pay as you go phone. adam got the shiny LG vu and i go the samsung propel. we get rebates so i justified it. plus i just had to get one with a full key pad. seriously. it makes texting a million times a day so much easier. we got insurance this time though so maybe they will last us longer...

the letters of wednesday

i recently checked out this book called "the wednesday letters" at the library. it's christian fiction about a couple who was married for like 40 years and every wednesday the husband would write the wife a letter. they kept all the letters and the book is about how the children go through them and it tells a story about their journey of marriage for so long.
not sure if this is a real known book or concept but i had never heard of it. even though i ended up not interested in reading the book after a few chapters (plus i can't really be too distracted when i have to babysit so many kids. these kids are just waiting for a chance to do something crazy. you should see them when i just go to the bathroom!) i loved the idea of a couple doing this. i told my husband about the book and he thought it would be a cool idea for us to try. so now on wednesdays we are both taking a little time out of our day to write down a few thoughts, ideas and feelings in a notebook and we will keep them hopefully forever. he writes mine in a transformers notebook. i think that's pretty sweet.

police calls, screaming kids and deliverance

things are hard.
the hubby and i are having quite a few issues.
i've been feeling sick.
i have a flat tire.
we are poor.
jonah was yelling at me all day.
i got the cops called on me for putting a note in someone's car.
my doctor's office is no longer accepting my insurance.

God always gets me through. there is a light at the end of the very long, dark, scary tunnel. when i stop to see the great things that God does for me and my family i feel like poo for complaining for a second.
i have a wonderful husband who loves me very much and tolerates me when i'm hormonal.
i'm healthy enough. God has gotten me safely through 4 surgeries and giving birth to a baby.
yes i have a flat tire but at least i have a car. i car that runs. and i don't have to sleep in it.
i have several babysitting jobs for really great families. my husband started a new job today.
i have a beautiful healthy son who i love very much and is such a blessing even when he yells.
yeah the cops called me about it but they very much disagreed with her calling them. and i finally got a huge burden out of my life.
i have insurance. there are other doctors.

i am so very lucky. i love my life. i don't really have many friends but the ones i do have i know care about me very much. my mom supports me so much even when i disappoint her with my piercings and tattoos. i am so lucky to have such a generous, caring mother.
God takes care of me. my family. He can take care of YOU too. : )